facebook twitter instagram linkedin google youtube vimeo tumblr yelp rss email podcast blog search

RIOT

January was another good month in the stock market. In fact, since the night of the election the U.S. stock market has been on a tear. Better yet, there’s no sign of it letting up any time soon. Financials, tech, consumer staples, oil, precious metals, real estate, utilities, healthcare, emerging markets. Just about everything is participating, and hopefully you are also.

At Good Life we’ve had a pretty good run the past few months. What was a challenging 2016 is turning into a great start for 2017. We normally would be thankful for our good fortune, but every time we turn on the television we’re being told we have been wronged and should be upset with way things are going in our country. We thought everything was going pretty well, but you know, come to think of it, three of our sixteen trades we placed in January didn’t make us any money. Maybe it’s someone else’s fault. Maybe it was fake news that made us buy those three stocks. Or maybe Russia hacked into our server and stole our investment ideas. Or quite possibly the outcome had to do with our outdated electoral college. No matter what, we’re pretty sure the Trump administration had something to do with our misfortune.

The more we think about it, we believe all Americans should make money on every investment. Universal healthcare and trading profits should be our unalienable rights as citizens, and someone on Wall Street better do something about it or we are going ninja warrior.

We all know that every protest needs lots of participants. We need angry and loud. So to launch our stock market protest, we need you to get mad. If any of you have ever lost money in the past, we want all of you to get up out of your chairs. We want you to get up right now and go to the window. Open it, and stick your head out, and yell, “I’ve lost money in the stock market, and I’m as mad as heck, and I’m not going to take this anymore!”

The stock market took our money from us on three trades, and it’s probably taken money from you too. It’s unjust. By golly, it’s un-American. We’ve been wronged. So we need you to pull your old black ski outfit out of the attic, pick up a couple of rocks out of the flower bed, and let’s hit the streets. We’ll pick up some washed up actors trying to revive their careers along the way, maybe a couple of musicians. Let’s all march right down Wall Street, maybe break a few windows, and demand the bankers come out of their offices and give us our money back. We found a speech we might want to use.

“Yes, we’re angry. Yes, we’re outraged. Yes, we’ve thought an awful lot of blowing up Wall Street”.

A little over the top? Okay, then just find the nearest camera and scream some obscenities about how mean and crazy President Trump is, that’ll get us on the 6:00 News.

It seems everyone’s throwing a fit these days. Public temper tantrums are the new reality show. They may not make much sense, but they sure are entertaining. You just need a cause. So c’mon gang, get your game faces on, grab your protest signs, and let’s get our Wall Street riot on. “No more losses. No more losses. Louder! No more losses.”